Friday, July 23, 2010

Crow Story!

Walking by the sea front in the morning, I observed the crows were over excited. There was a crow with a badminton shuttle cock in its beak and the other crows were crowding around this crow excitedly. The proud crow held the shuttle cock like a trophy and began to pluck the feathers. There was more excitement and cawing. He would look side ways with an arrogant turn of neck and again start plucking out the cork. The whole display of bravado attracted some eagles too. They hovered low and two crows flew after these circling eagles. Now the crow with the shuttle cock grew more possessive and took flight to an isolated rock a bit farther into the sea. He was still convinced that he had found a dead bird and the joy of pulling out the feathers was evident in the way he thrust his breast out and pinned down the ravaged shuttle cock.

After good ten minutes of plucking the feathers and cork, the crow realized that the thing was of no use, he flew back to his friends and continues to display his prized possession. By now other crows had started prancing with some odd stuff, one held a wet brown bag in its beak, other had dug out a shell and jumped from rock to rock following the crow with the shuttle cock. After a while another friendly crow joined the shuttle cock crow and they got busy with scraping some sort of edible algae from the rock surface.

The shuttle cock was forgotten, seeing this, another crow gingerly came close to the abandoned shuttle cock and as soon as he picked it up the crow who had found it pounced upon him. This made me laugh and I could not help thinking how human was this behaviour. Even when we realize how useless some of our precious possessions are we guard them with our life and the moment some one encroaches on this possession, well, the crow reaction happens, lay off your claws!

Another interesting thing I want to share is: we were visiting husband’s friend after so many years came to know of a very unique thing about him. He was aware of his previous birth as a child. He used to tell his parents that he had died in a car accident in Calcutta and remembered the number plate of the car. He dreads visiting Calcutta but is confident that he can easily navigate the streets, though he has never visited the city before. When I asked him what all he remembered on a lot of prodding he spoke of being driven in this car and that both the driver and he were killed in the accident. He remembers that he used to wear a white dhoti and was a businessman. We joked about finding out his widow and check if he had left a will. This is the first time I have met a person who remembers his past birth and since he was quiet reluctant to share his experience with anyone, and knowing him so well, there is no doubt that he telling the truth. I really wish that he would go back to Calcutta and find out who he was, though it is easy as his father had found out that the car with the number plate he remembered had actually met with an accident and the occupants had died, a strange co-incident is that ion the same date a few years later he took birth again.

There is something I have also experienced about the date, when I had delivered my daughter I had a disembodied voice tell me that this child had my brother’s soul who had expired when he was three. Then it told me to ask me about the significance of seventeenth September in relation to the brother. This was the date of birth of my new born daughter. I was scared initially as this was a strange dream and I had just delivered, I called my mother and asked her if the date had some significance for my brother. She told me that he had died on that date. I was stunned. It is quiet possible than that the date of birth has some relation to the date when we die in previous life?

Still in Mumbai, and absorbing this restless city. Will keep you all posted, take care and enjoy awareness of self as I am realizing our existence is more like a dream, with us like masses of concentrated energy, living the dream that is sniffed off so easily. While I walk, sometimes it feels like every thing, the people, sand, sea, trees are extension of this energy or that I am an extension of that whole!
Pic: Since I don't have the USB cable for my phone, I couldn't post the crow pictures. Here is Jayu on the beach! Crow pictures will be here soon via blue tooth!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010


Gray clouds framed by darkening tree tops, birds are alarmed as light diminishes. The kitten my daughter had brought has again wandered off, I think his mother is near the tiny shopping complex here. Breeze touches the green leaves and then touches the water in small rain water puddles creating tiny ripples.

Some days are like mirages, when every thing appears false and illusionary, the life as it had progressed from being an infant to now and all that is to the life. Reading this book replete with History of East India company and Mughals, I am wondering if in a century humans will look back to all that is happening now as 'primitive'. Things formidable and most important gradually get buried in the dust storms of time and yet the present gives them such serious importance. The wars, stoning in the name of religion, hatred in personal relations, greed, taking others for a ride, all this what does it add up to? In the vast depth of Universe birthing galaxies and devouring stars, it is nothing. Where does this ego and all thing it manifests stand in the grand scheme of things? Then why it scatters us so that the creation appears meaningless, that words and acts turn sour and stale and moments of utter hopelessness crowd the heart.

Does not make any sense, the creation placed in this vastness is a contrast, our feeling of being adrift is a contrast to the calm chaos of cosmos. We are a contrast to the eternal presence of Universe, sprouting like mushrooms and vanishing with our seasons. Knowing well our frail bubble like existence, deep sorrows corrode souls. What a hilarious comedy the creator has brought about. Knowing well we know nothing or close our eyes against the light.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Raining thoughts!

Sun rays streaking through damp leaves and soft barks. I go out to capture the bees meticulously drawing the nectar from bright yellow cup-like flowers dotting the succulent leaves. To my surprise these flowers have closed up, petals drawn tightly to form a bud again, now I understand why bees were so busy earl in the morning collecting the nectar before the petals closed up! A dove and its chick peacefully look about as gray clouds gently roll out licking away the blue from the sky. Parrots frolic in mango leaves dropping the unripe mangoes in my garden, I pick up one and smell its ripe yellow fragrance, I cut the part parrot has tasted and place its fresh pulp on my tongue. It is divine, to draw in what this powerful tree has sucked from Mother Earth. As the juice fills my being, I sense the bond of the tree with the soil spreading in my body. The sky it has captured through the green chlorophyll, the breeze rustling its leaves and the soil holding its roots in a tight embrace all, I sense in this bite. My tree become me!

My friend use to point out, see how well provided these birds are, all around the year they have either fruits or flowers to fill their tiny bellies, how true! Am waiting for the tight buds of hibiscus to unfold and spread some colour. Balsam plants with its delicately coloured flowers dangling precariously, with mild fragrance of talc are growing strong. In a while they will have seed pods that explode at touch and the pod curls releasing the black-round seeds.

I often go for nature walks with Jayu and we end up questioning each out why a seed is shaped the way it is. Recently, we found one beneath a tree that bounced like a soft spongy ball! She correctly figured out that it was to facilitate its dispersal. Some lilies have decided to surprise me, suddenly erupting through the wet Earth. There are green leaves standing proudly to be harvested. Nature is so giving, from where have we learned keeping things to ourselves?

In the innocence of any new born's eyes, you can see the beauty of creation, it can be a little lizard baby testing waters, trying to befriend you. It is believed now that each cell has intelligence and memory. If this is true, every thing that the collective nervous system invites, is processed by all the cells. If all cells communicate in some manner, maybe they exchange at some subtle sub atomic, vibratory level? If this exchange really happens then we can consciously make it a healing experience by knowing the source of things we put into our body through our mouths. Dunno,just something occurred to me as I tasted that mango. Maybe I feel this way as I have come to love this mango tree and watch its branches sheltering so many lives, feeding so many.

Long time back when I was carrying my younger child, suddenly I found that breathing was getting difficult in the third month of pregnancy. Early in the morning in pre-dawn darkness when the air was crisp, I saw a Peepal tree. Peepal is the only tree that gives out Oxygen during night. I was really in bad shape and I went to this huge ancient tree and placed my hands on its rugged bark. I asked if with its wisdom and healing it could heal me of this breathing problem. I plucked its tender leaves and ate them. I did this every morning in the dark so that no one would watch me talking to a tree! Within that week this breathing problem vanished,may be it was a placebo effect, but what ever it was, it was wonderful.

Yesterday, I observed that I can no more stand looking into pale eyes, sly eyes and jaded eyes. Strange but as I crossed the busy crossings with these vagabond women begging in the streets, their eyes hit me like stones. Something too raw and cruel about them. Better to look at the grass or the skyline than stare into stale paleness that in someway corrupts the soul. Funny thing is that animals always have innocent eyes.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Indian Monsoon

Indecisive clouds crowd the horizons, they brood. Should we pour here or travel to another land and then release the condensing droplets. It is as if they have a mind of their own. Tiny black mosquitoes stealthily attack, quietly sucking the blood and bloating up. In Delhi excessive use of fertilizers and the vehicular pollution has led to extinction of frogs as a result mosquitoes breed heavily during rainy season. People fall sick and die as dengu fever spreads but still they don't stop using chemical fertilizers. Yesterday, I was watching news and saw how milk products were being adulterated. Cheats are everywhere in their worm-like existence, selling poison or posh arm dealers or elite intelligentsia that creates systems that no one understands and then everyone washes their hands off-they say they have nothing to do when people lose their jobs. They are not responsible for suicides as companies distribute pink slips like candies and they feign ignorance smugly pocketing their 'bonus and perks' just as millions cut corners to save for the inevitable 'rainy days'.

Two decades ago first showers of rain would see us out inhaling, imbibing chewing the fragrance of dry Earth guzzling the first down pour. Velvety red 'bir bahutis' would crawl out and children would collect these pretty insects in mud-filled bottles. Now, the indecisive clouds hover above my mango tree and there are no little red 'bir bahutis' for my daughter to admire. Things have changed and how! Jayani saw frogs this time, sensing the humidity they had burrowed their way out into little puddles of water, she was ecstatic making them jump and swim. Wonder how many such joyous moments humanity has robbed off, generations will never realise, all in the name of 'development'.


Dark clouds, wild clouds, swirling gray, black and blue
Distressed goddess, an enraged mane
Leaves play with winds, jasmine smiles
Nests sway, branches splinter, chicks clutch pale straw

Feet on the wet mud, flesh drenched in the first water
Like the amniotic fluid, pulsating, warm
Lazy ripe mangoes drop violently splattering yellow pulp
Clouds smile a warm slow smile, Earth steams
Love happens and pregnant Earth births a zillion lives